Maverick, Debbie and I went to the Tulsa State Fair last night. It has been several years since Debbie and I have ventured out for a look at the Fair – and for good reasons.
First, the vendors were always in the same exact place. Whether you wanted your handwriting analyzed, a piece of copper kettle fudge, a new yardstick from the electric company (are they a different size each year?) or to see the world’s smallest woman you knew exactly where to go.
Secondly, I begin to worry about the world when I go to the fair. Where do these people come from? I do not think of myself as a judgmental person but there are some real weirdo types at the fair. I promise you that you do not have to pay to see a freak show because you can see them walking around in plain sight right there in front of you. Some have piercings all over their bodies! Tattoos are rampant – these people have as many as an NFL player. One fellow I saw last night had a Mohawk hairstyle only he had spiked the Mohawk into separate clumps that made his head look like a weapon. And there was a ring hanging from his nose that I am pretty sure if you pulled would release the pin that would put the head spinning and cause the head to explode. These weirdoes do not survive in solitude. At the fair they run in herds. So I try not to stare because I do not want them to stampede. I think they scare law enforcement officials as well because last night the sheriff deputies were walking around in groups of two or three as well.
Lastly, it is the cost of the stupid thing. Debbie’s got a bum knee so we paid to park close. By the time we got in the gate we had already dropped $31 for parking and admittance. Nothing at the fair (with the exception of the 50-cent freak shows) cost less than $2.50. Even if you eat before you go to the Fair there is a 100% chance you will be hungry as soon as you enter the fairgrounds. I think it is the convergence of the fragrances of smoked turkey legs, corn dogs, fudge, Chinese food, pizza, tacos, caramel popcorn, hamburgers, cheese sticks, cotton candy and all the other foods that cause your brain to think it is time to eat again. Each of these items run $4 to $7 a piece but your brain has to have one of each – it is not your stomach because your stomach is full and sending stop signals which the brain ignores. Maverick had to play a 3 games a $5 a piece which took 22 seconds to do. He brought home two small stuffed colorful fishes which I could have bought at Wal-mart for 33-cents. At the souvenir stand Maverick had to have something – anything. So we got a $12 special agent gun package with a variety of plastic pistols and darts. This would have been $3.75 at Wal-Mart. Luckily Maverick did not want to ride any rides.
Some things were different at this year’s fair because of tax dollars at work. Over the last several years the county has been replacing some of the old buildings and putting up new barns and exhibit halls and laid new asphalt on the midway area. So it was interesting to see the changes. It made the livestock exhibits more fun to walk through knowing they had nicer places.
Maverick enjoyed seeing the animals. I need to have him spend a few days with Dennis – the KS Cowboy – though. He thought bunnies and rabbits were different things. I told him bunnies were young rabbits like kitties are young cats. I jokingly asked what he thought baby rabbits were called. He said, “rabblets.” I am not sure if he was joking back.
Debbie, Maverick and I decided it would be several years before we go backto the Tulsa State Fair. Next year at this time we are going to build a fire out back and just burn a hundred dollars and say we went.
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